MostlyHarmless

4 year old: is money real or pretend? Me: *clears throat* *takes sip of water* *arranges notes on podium*

French protests have three stages:

1. Peaceful marching
2. Rioting/arson (targeting banks, not homes)
3. Mass strikes & economic shutdown The French elite fear Stage 1 because they know Stages 2 and 3 are coming. Canadians only do Stage 1 and our elites ignore it because they know there is no real threat of escalation.

In Star Trek people often complain that replicated food is not as good as naturally produced food, which is weird when replicators are presumably using the same technology as transporters, which can perfectly replicate Spock every time. But is Spock getting less flavoursome over time? In this essay I shall…

Where do I see myself in five years? Well five years ago I did not see myself here so this game obviously doesn't work.

Please stop raising awareness. There is too much. I have become too aware.

'Normal' is apparently getting dressed in clothes you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car you’re still paying for in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it.

I’ve faced way more peer pressure to eat protein in adulthood than I did to take drugs as a teen.

My poor knowledge of Greek mythology has always been my Achille's elbow.

Thank you, credit card companies, for helping me afford to live in Alberta. I don't think I can ever repay you.

What's the correct ratio of gunpowder to essential oils? I want this bath bomb to be perfect.

Life is too short to remove USB safely.

Be a minimalist. It’s the least you can do.

Just because you're not paranoid doesn't mean they're not out to get you.

People need to start appreciating the effort I put into not being a serial killer.

It happened to me: I didn't buy snacks so that I wouldn't have snacks in the house and now I don't have snacks in the house.

The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.

Don't make me regret letting you merge.

There’ s no “I ” in team, but there are three in narcissistic and they’re all quite handsome.

Life gets a lot easier once you decide to become part of the problem.

All I'm saying is that, at any point on that ride through the desert, he could have given that horse a name.

For I was hungry, and you voted against the school lunch program that provided me my only meal of the day; I was thirsty and you voted against clean water legislation; a stranger and you deported me without due process to an infamous prison in El Salvador.